Tuesday, December 3, 2013
i started a new job this week.
i came to terms with the carpet in our living room.
i realized it's best to do only one project at a time.
like this flower crown.
and that some things just take time.
i started feeling sniffly last night, woke up with a tight throat this morning, and when i looked in the mirror my left eye was red and bloodshot. i went about my day and felt mostly okay, on this freezing cold, snowy december day, but by the time i got home from work i thought i might have the flu. my stomach has been upset and i just generally feel wobbly and weak and desirous to not move or do anything other than watching parks and rec and for some reason i have the desire to knit. why do i use my blog as an outlet to document when i'm sick? sorry about that, you guys.
Friday, November 22, 2013
i'm not so structured. i'm okay with sleeping in and planning my day last minute and i don't feel the need to make every post on here perfectly edited. i'm finicky with crumbs in the kitchen so spreading cold butter onto bread makes my insides tense up. i think about making art and design literally every single day like it is my drug. sometimes i think of college as a prison because i am waiting until i have a degree to pursue a design career. unless any of you know of an amazing design gig that would be available to a college student here in salt lake city? didn't think so. i've committed myself to no excuses and i'm just making art happen any way i can. i can't go on much longer living someone else's life. i'm ready for you, design world. i've dissected my desires profusely in the last year and i am now fairly certain what i want to do with the rest of my life. and at the same time, i have no idea how it will all pan out.
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Sunday, November 17, 2013
i rarely share photos on my blog that i didn't take myself. however, when i came across these photos i was stopped dead in my tracks. the images are from the book tippi of africa, authored by the girl's french photographer parents who raised her in the african wild from birth to age ten. the book is definitely on my must-buy list. since i can't go back in time and give myself this childhood, i dream of giving my own children this sort of gift one day. it's totally eliza from the wildthornberry's, right?
without further ado:
without further ado:
Friday, November 8, 2013
Thursday, October 31, 2013
there is only about 1% of the pink left in my hair and i'm totally sad about it. i wish it was easier to have colorful hair whenever i want. i wish it was easier to travel whenever i want. i wish it was easier to go to college and not be ridiculously poor. i wish making a living was easier. i wish fulfilling careers were easier to obtain. i wish balancing personal and work life was easier. i wish fulfilling friendships were easier to come by.
i'm feeling extremely 99% this week as reality is hitting and we are heading back to salt lake to crappy jobs and utah's upcoming winter. we have an exact number of dollars to get an apartment and back to work to start earning money again. it's not that i'm depressed or negative or ungrateful. i'm just aware and i'm just facing reality. it's okay to do that because anything else is denial and denial makes you feel empty. even if some of the spaces are filled with a few dark spots, at least it's not empty. i don't usually do empty, and for that i am grateful. what would a sunny day look like if there were no shade? i wouldn't like it.
you could try to give me a pep talk about how with the bad comes the good and how there is no fulfillment without challenges and that through opposition comes opportunity, but i'll save you the breath, because i know all that. i am that choir. i wrote that pep talk. i am that pep talk. and i do appreciate that pep talk. but sometimes, just let those low feelings exist for a little bit. it's wholeness i'm going for, and to be a complete person i need to not be robbed of the low feelings. just let me have the low feelings. let me be a complete person. let me wallow in sadness about leaving a city that i fell in love with and heading back to a state i could do without for a while. life's not over. it's not. but there are real challenges ahead and i'm bracing myself, which i would count myself wise for.
i'll be back to the dreaming and loving and hoping and infatuating and all that delicious, whip cream, yummy stuff soon enough.
i have no idea how other people keep their blogs so la vie en rose. for what it's worth, you can always count on me to display the good and the bad. i don't know how else to do it.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
i won't waste your time or mine by spelling out all the details of the absolute unnecessary hassle i went through this last week with google and their all-star customer service for this blog. in a tiny little nutshell, my custom domain expired because google has 35,000 employees and none to help someone who only pays them $10 a year for her domain. if you didn't notice, my blog was down for a few days. and then, like that, it wasn't! i'm still not even sure what went down that google decided to let it exist again, but something did happen and now i do have a blog again!
here are the last of our california coast road trip photos. and just you wait for another 10 million photos over the course of the coming weeks. also, the last few days without a blog made me realize how many times i have thoughts i want to put on this blog but end not putting on this blog. i want to chronicle more of my thoughts here. i think i will forever love my blog.
oh and i know that in a few years i will look back and wonder why i felt compelled to share a thousand photos that look extremely similar. and i know, i know, i know, i know, i know i will roll my eyes that these photos are so highly-edited and filtered. i know. but i like them now and now will always trump later.